Buzz buzz buzzzzz. Is the noise you would make if you were a fly. Buzz is also an onomatopoeia. Have you ever thought about transforming into an insect? How about Metamorphosis by Kafka, you read it? You could annoy people for a living if you transformed into a fly. How wonderful.

-It would be normal for you to bother humans by landing on the mouth of their sticky sweet sodas and spreading your nasty bug diseases all over it. Those less adventurous lose all appetite for their beverage they were previously enjoying, all because of you. <3

-You could rub your front two legs together all scary and evil genius like, to frighten men, women, and young children all over the globe. New scare tactic 2014? I think so.

-Being a tiny bug would allow you to spy on everyone all time time without being noticed. Do you remember that Miley Cyrus wrote a song called “Fly on the Wall” about that exact concept. You could hide, retrieve messages for the enemy, and see what that class cutie is up to after school. (It’s not even weird because you wouldn’t be human anymore. Things like that are acceptable in the insect kingdom) 😉

-You would have a really weird curlicue tongue that looked like that bubblegum tape but actually functioned. You would also have five bajillion eyes (more or less) so your life perspective would be turned upside down and magnified several hundred times.

-You would be nimble and quick, like that guy named Jack with a candlestick?

-Avoiding fly swatters wouldn’t even be necessary if you became fast friends with the owners of the houses you broke into. Did I mention that 66% of all flies are really friendly? You’d most likely be good.

-Newspapers are so valuable no one would dare try to kill you with one of those.

Sarah says she would like to know what animal you’ve thought about being lately.