Teen fashion: Devolving back in time?


Matthew Smith, Staff Writer

These days, what’s “in” changes on a weekly basis. From ‘Devious Licks’ to Among Us, it seems as if every week brings a new fad. However, parents of Edina High School students are noticing a pattern from a fashion standpoint.

“My son is wearing those baggy pants and Smashing Pumpkins shirts like my boyfriend did back in ‘96!” parent and PTO member Susan Johnson said. “I just don’t see why my kids don’t think I’m hip and swag when they’re all dressing like me.”

Doc Marten stocks are through the roof and everyone looks like Marty McFly. EHS is either as colorful as a neon sign or as full of denim as a 2002 People magazine. 

“Yeah, of course, I love wearing head-to-toe spandex!” freshman Candice Smith said. “In a sea of Air Force 1’s and Edina hoodies, I feel very noticed in my suit vest and skin-tight, bell-bottom jeans!” 

“Grandma is the new aesthetic. Nothing is quite as drippy as a sweater vest with knee-high socks,” junior Erin Williams said. EHS administration has received numerous questions from concerned parents. Could the school musical Mamma Mia be influencing this rise in retro fashion? Is this a Neo-Hippie movement that possesses the end goal of socialist school teachings? Despite parental confusion, students continue to party and dress like it’s 1999 all throughout the halls. Some students have even begun providing hand warmers at door five prior to first hour. Zephyrus field reporter Aditya Suresh asked Principal Andy Beaton for more information.

“Well, I see these students enter the school with their converse, color block windbreakers, and Prince tour shirts and I can’t help but wonder, what’s next? Are Walkmans coming back? Will these miscreants go back to fanny packs? Maybe I should get my starter jacket back out.” Mr. Beaton said.

Whether this trend will fade over time or maintain dominion over EHS is up for debate. Yet, on the topic of fads, one can only hope that fidget spinners do not return.