The world is flat. Forget anything you have been taught at school – it’s all lies. My job here is to help debunk a few worldly myths, one country at a time. This week, we take a closer look at the Canadian province.

Canadians only eat moose:

*Meese

This is Canada’s greatest secret for survival. Moose meat is known to have a special protein that raises your metabolism, in turn generating more body heat. This is how Canadian’s are able to withstand subarctic temperatures year round. In fact, Meese are so treasured that people often keep them as pets and ride them to work every morning. This tenderizes the meat and starts the reaction between the enzymes and glucose.

Canada is so safe people don’t lock their doors:

This is absolutely ridiculous. Of course they lock their doors, how else are they supposed to protect themselves from the giant-man eating beavers that kill hundreds every year? This leads to my next point…

Canada has free healthcare:

True, but unfortunately, for a rather sad reason. The cost of injuries and deaths from the giant man-eating beavers got to be so great that the government was forced to implement free health care in order for people to get help and stop the population rate from plummeting.

Canadians are afraid of the dark:

No. In fact, Canadians embrace the dark. With eleven out of twelve months plunged in a dark, subarctic winter (where the sun never even rises), Canadians have grown to use the darkness as one of their greatest weapons.

Canadians are obsessed with “Oh Canada”:

True. Canadians are extremely proud of their national anthem. Speakers are even installed in the streets to blast this wonderful song every half an hour. During this time Mounties are known to patrol the streets to make sure that every citizen is singing along.

All Canadians say ‘eh:

There has recently been a rumor going around that this is a myth. Do not be fooled – this is just what Canadians want you to think. ‘Eh is in fact a secret code word known by all citizens of this northern country. Its place in the sentence, frequency, and tone all contribute to a different meaning or command. So remember, next time you’re talking to a Canadian and you hear them say “‘Eh,” they could be secretly commenting on your bad choice of outfit.