Ah yes, the old debate that parents always have with their teenage children when their birthday comes around; Do you really need the latest smartphone when you already have a functioning one? Now that the new iPhone 15 has popped up, the argument has been reheated, and there are a lot of factors to consider before making a switch. 

The first question to ask is always: What does the new phone have that your current phone doesn’t? This depends on the age of your phone. For example, if you have an iPhone 6 and you want to switch to the new iPhone 15, you can probably name a lot of things that the phone you’re getting does better than the one you have now, like a better quality camera. However, if you have an iPhone 14 Max Pro and you want an iPhone 15 Max Pro, what’s the difference, a charger? If you don’t have any good reason that actively benefits you, it helps to question your real motive for wanting a new phone. I promise you if you get a phone case people won’t be able to tell the difference between the two.

The second question is, when you get the new phone, what are you going to do with the old one? You can’t have two phones with two numbers, so you have to arrange to dispose it. Give it to your mentally underdeveloped 5-year-old cousin? Donate it to your local Goodwill? The options are endless! Just don’t throw it in the garbage, because then you’re contributing to acid battery pollution. So if you’re going to throw it away, properly dispose of it. Or you can take it apart and sell the parts or use them to improve another piece of technology in the house, like your Nintendo Switch.

Third of all, why an iPhone? If there’s anything I’ve learned in my 15 years of life (hey, just like the iPhone!), never buy a product because of the brand. Why don’t you try another phone? They’re probably cheaper than Apple’s, and might have some benefits that help you more than an iPhone would, like Google’s Pixel phone allowing you to amp up the quality of your old photos. As a proud Android owner myself (yeah, yeah, boo all you want), I can vouch that having a smaller brand smartphone isn’t a horrible experience. Google, Nokia, LG, Asus . . . you have to remember that it’s a free market, and if your last iPhone was a bad one, you’re not obligated to buy a new one. Besides, Apple currently has a monopoly over the mobile phone market, with the stock being overvalued due to too many investors looking for a “safe haven” so they don’t make money for the shareholders! Consider using your purchase to help the underdog rise to the top. Plus, a lawsuit was filed against Apple for using child labor in the Democratic Republic of Congo in order to mine cobalt, so consider that one every single time you reach for your AirPods. 

Finally, re-evaluate your goals with having a phone. Do you need one? Of course you do, because you need to make calls, to stay in contact. The question is, is that the only reason? Sometimes other, more unnecessary features of a smartphone overshadow the real, main reason you need one. How do you know your main priority isn’t really Snapchat? Having to record every public altercation to post online? Just really, really, really needing to play that strangely popular fruit-dropping game while class is in session? If so, you may have accidentally developed every parent’s worst fear: electronic addiction. I know it may be hard to admit, but you may only want a smartphone just for the screen. However, there is a cure, but it’s bitter: Let it go. Lots of people are going screen-free with their phones after they realized the harms they may pose, with social media proven to cause many mental health problems and addictions, and some platforms even showing you things they know will hurt you to maximize profit and keep you on the site (cough cough, Facebook, cough cough). Maybe a flip phone would be a nice change of pace for you, only for a little bit, just to prove to yourself that you only have a smartphone because it’s a phone, and not a mini-computer in your pocket.

Hopefully these words of the wise helped you reconsider and question your real intentions for wanting that iPhone 15 so badly, and saved you that yelling match with your aunt after you discover that the suspiciously phone-shaped present was actually 32 pairs of construction-themed socks. Because the truth is, folks, if your parents could survive with a glorified walkie-talkie, you can definitely survive with the third newest iPhone. Learn to accept and be thankful for what you have, and try to earn and achieve what you don’t. And remember, it’s only a real problem if you find yourself running away from the solution. Dattebayo readers!

This piece was originally published in Zephyrus’ print edition on November 30, 2023.