The Short Girl

October 10, 2014

 

First, I would like to say that even though I might be complaining about my height, I am proud of my 160.02 centimeters. In fact, being short has a few perks: wearing heels isn’t dramatic, finding a date taller than me is easy as it seems that everyone’s taller, and back seats in a car are actually quite comfortable

1. I am a profession cuffer of all pants (even those claimed to be short- they are not short enough).

2. Reaching for something on a top shelf becomes part of Michelle Obama’s sixty minutes of daily exercise regime.

3. You can’t touch the floor when you sit in chairs, and if the balls of your feet just barely scrape the floor, then it’s a successful mission.

4. Most people find one of the most obvious benefits of being short to be the cute, dainty feet. This is so false, as I, Anna Gratzer, have size ten feet and stand solidly below average height.

5. I am lost in a sea of people. Come passing time, you’ll never find me.

6. I can’t fully appreciate the St. Louis Park Movie Theater because I need seats to be “stadium style”. Otherwise, I spend an hour and a half to two hours examining the neck of the person in front of me for $10.50.

7. Making a bed becomes a dive across the Red Sea trying to escape an evil Egyptian King.

8. When I go to the doctor and have to lie down on the examination table, I am shamed by having to use the pull-out drawer to climb onto the table.

9. I am placed in the front of every single group picture. In family photos, I stand with my cousins that still add “and a half” to their age.

10. I find myself constantly questioning the IQ of store managers, and their need to put “short” jeans/pants above the regular sizes. I feel as though they are mocking my inability to reach them.

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